Strawberry Blonde
by Lily in Wonderland
Summary: After a particularly stressful day during the Victory Tour, Haymitch finds a way to lighten the mood. Effie is not very pleased about it.


_Haymitch POV._

Katniss and Peeta are so exhausted by the Victory Tour that they haven't even touched their food.

Seven districts done, four more to do and the Capitol, then we'd be back to 12.

The ride from 5 to 4 is still long. According to Effie's schedule we have to spend the night on the train and tomorrow we'll have breakfast with the mayor, then the kids will make their usual speech and at the end we have a party to attend.

She managed to repeat it so many times since we got back on the train that even I have memorized it.

Now however she's silent, sitting in front of me, next to a motionless Katniss, staring intently at her dinner as if at any moment it could jump off the table and take a walk to the wagons; thinking about it, the meat is so fresh that it wouldn't surprise me if it did.

The thought makes me giggle and soon the girl's eyes rose to meet mine.

"What?" she blurts out awkwardly, without worrying about playing nice.

Obviously she's thinking that I'm drunk enough to start talking to myself, the truth is that today I haven't touched a drop of whiskey.

At the lunch with the mayor of the District 5 Effie prevented the avoxes to pour me more wine after the sixth glass, and that stuff was so diluted in water that it almost lost its flavor.

As if that weren't enough, back on the train, I had the nice surprise to find out that the previous night I had emptied the bar, and now we were waiting for supplies.

However, since you could cut the atmosphere with a knife, and now that the general idea was that, why not continue on my path?

I drop my eyes on Effie, sitting straighter, and she returns my gaze with a confused expression. Only the sight of that almost makes me burst out laughing again.

"I was thinking…" I say, without looking down, but bringing a generous spoonful of peas into my mouth and talking with my mouth full. "I was thinking what could our _lovely_ escort hide under those horrible wigs."

I don't know what annoyed her the most, if the phrase itself, my bad attempt to mock her silly accent or the fact that my chewed morsel had been put on display for all to see.

I see her stiffen in her chair as she purses her lips; she was probably trying to suppress some answer that didn't suit dinner time. But annoying Effie is not my only goal achieved, because now even on Katniss' lips there's the shadow of a smile and I don't have to turn around to see that Peeta, who was sitting next to me, is trying to hide a grin.

"Seriously, princess. Why the hell do you insist on wearing them? What do you have under there? A pair of horns?" I bring another morsel to my mouth and, to avoid laughing, even Katniss does the same.

I turn my head to Peeta, who tries in every way to not look up at Effie.

She shakes her head, blushing slightly. "I can assure you that I have nothing wrong under my wigs, I wear them for pure aesthetics. I can change my hair color every day and combine it with what I wear." Her voice tone begins to heat up, then I continue on my way because obviously is the right one.

I slam my hand on the table with a satisfied expression on my face, the other three bounce in surprise. "That's it, then. You must have a horrible hair color…" I look at Katniss, ignoring Effie's murderous glare. "What do you think?" I ask.

Katniss shrugs, turning her head toward Effie and then back to me. "I think she has red hair." Then she fills her mouth and glances at Peeta who in the meantime had almost finished eating and nods. "Yeah, I agree." He says.

I think about it while looking at her and I can see that under the ton of makeup that she's wearing, she's starting to become crimson. "Effie a ginger… mh, maybe."

"Haymitch!"

"Nah, you're right. I think you're blonde…"

"Enough!"

I think that was supposed to be a threatening tone, but with that accent and her face covered with colors I really can't take her seriously; the result is that I burst out laughing in her face and at that point the two kids follow me.

When I think Effie is about to explode, instead she calms down. She takes a deep breath and she reassembles. "Finish your meal and go to bed. All of you. Tomorrow will be another busy day."

I clear my throat, but do not add more. I got what I wanted and I killed two birds with one stone: I teased Effie, I lifted the mood in the room even if briefly, and in order to keep their mouths busy and don't laugh the kids have also emptied their dishes. I can't be more satisfied, so I get up without waiting for the others and I retire to my room.

I regret the fact that I haven't brought more bottles from home, to end the day properly, but it seems that if I want to put my hands on something stronger than water or orange juice I'll have to wait to get to District 4.

I'm about to lie down on the bed when I hear a knock at the door, there aren't many options on who it might be, I expect Katniss or Peeta and instead when I open the door I face Effie.

Maybe now that dinner is over she wants to complain about my bad manners, I'm not really in the mood, so I try to shut the door in her face but she is faster than I thought and manages to slip into my room.

Here we go, now I'll have to stay here for at least another twenty minutes and listen to a monologue about manners and how to behave in the presence of a lady.

To my surprise, instead, she apologizes for how she reacted earlier. I look at her as if she had just said that fire is cold.

Effie crosses her arms over her chest and brings her eyes to the ceiling, apparently even she doesn't believe what she's doing. "Katniss and Peeta are very exhausted. How can I blame them? Make them laugh was a good idea, I apologize if I misunderstood your intent."

I think that letting her know that one of my points was also make her lose her head is not a smart thing to do, because Effie Trinket that gives me reason it's so rare that I prefer biting my tongue rather than spoil it.

I've been silent for too long though, so I open my mouth and say the first thing that comes to my mind. "No problem. But now I want to know what color is your hair."

"Haymitch… I just gave you credit, do not make me regret it."

I suppress a laugh but don't look away, because now I'm really curious. Before I was joking, but I'm beginning to believe that she's really hiding something underneath her wig. No human being can be so stubborn about such a stupid thing without a reasonable reason, then I remember where she comes from and I think about it, but I don't give up. "I didn't ask you to let me see, come on… It can't be that bad."

Effie seems to think about it, I can hear the gears in her brain moving under that mountain of plastic. Her lips clenches almost to disappear.

What's her problem? It's just hair… and I don't think I asked it in a rude way this time. "It's not polite not to answer a question." I try to encourage her and it seems to work.

She sighs, then she finally says: "Okay. It's strawberry blonde."

I stay still. Is she joking or is she serious? "Are you kidding me?" She looks at me confused and it amuses me. "Even your natural hair color has a mawkish name, I was hoping for something better."

Effie breathes noisily, then she shakes her head in annoyance. "I thought that an afternoon as a sober would have been good for you, but you got even worst."

"One more reason to make sure I always have a supply of whiskey in my room." I say, knowing that she would be bothered by being duped by her own words.

At that point, however, she does something that I don't expect: she brings her eyes to heaven and comes up to me, giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"Goodnight Haymitch. Tomorrow morning we have to be off the train at eight o'clock. Do not be late." With those words, she turns away and leaves my room, closing the door behind her.

I'm still surprised by her gesture and I don't realize that I'm still staring at the door. Yes, I was definitely sober for too long.

**A/N: I'm sorry if there are any mistakes, I did my best on the translation.**


End file.
